Whenever someone has asked me: "How are you? What´s up with you?" over the past week my answer has been consistently the same: "Nothing." and it was glorious. I don´t think I have been this relaxed since October and so content to have absolutely nothing on my agenda, no plans, no to dos. And compared to just a few months ago I am now able to fully enjoy it, I am capable of shutting up that little voice inside of my head, that tells me that I am not doing anything, that I am lazy.
It obviously still came up, but for maybe the first time in my life I was able to say: "I literally don´t have to do anything", turned around in bed and continued to sleep. To be fair I have not done much, but sleep and watch Netflix for a majority of the past two weeks. I have slept at least nine if not ten hours a day, I finished Ru Paul´s Dragrace Allstars, Yummy Mummies and Stranger Things and just enjoyed life. While I love setting goals for myself and love pushing myself to be the best version of myself I consciously decided to not set any goals for July. It is my last month before I start working full-time and I wanted to completely relax, outside of any expectations (especially my own) or track records. Instead I fully allowed myself to do things I enjoy, eat food I love and be with people, who make me happy. And even without that pressure I still went to the gym and did Yoga and enjoyed it even more. Putting pressure on myself is one of my biggest struggles and to see, that I still take care of myself and how incredibly good it felt to just let go for a few days was wonderful.
I spent a week at my mum´s and one at my boyfriend´s, I went to Amsterdam to see my former roomie and am just now en route to Berlin to meet up with some friends before flying to Porto for a week of bliss on Sunday. But for the first time in a long time I can let go of the stress of being on the road so much and just enjoy the moment. I feel like I have found some sort of peace just within myself, that travels with me. To say that is one of the greatest successes I have had so far this year is an understatement, it may be one of my greatest achievements in my life in general. I am so excited to start my new job, to meet new people, learn new things and to be able to do so fully relaxed and eager. I hope you all are able to enjoy your summer in the same way, to live each day fully and even if you have stress to find those moments of full relaxation within you.

Bought: An intense amount of accessories in Amsterdam and still beyond in love with them.

Finished: Homo Deus, which sadly was not as good as I hope it would be

Cried: Over the finale of Stranger Things. And while I loved this season and adore all the actors I am not really sure if I am happy, they decided to do another season

Travelled: To Amsterdam for a weekend to eat great food, drink too much wine, dance to Indie music with a room of 19 year olds and catch up with an old friend

Packed: For two weeks on the road.

Wondered: If there is an amount of sleep that will actually be enough and not make me want to take yet another nap in the afternoon.

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